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How to Write Your Wedding Vows: Tips, Prompts, and Examples!

So you’ve decided to write your own wedding vows… 

It may seem daunting to condense your love story and what you feel for your significant other into one small speech. Hopefully the tips, prompts, and examples I’m about to share will help you write your own wedding vows that you can be proud of. 

Simple tips to write your own wedding vows:

  1. First and foremost, PLEASE don’t procrastinate. It may FEEL more meaningful to write them last minute in the whirlwind of emotion, but I’m telling you right now, it’s not a good idea. Think about it this way: the person you are about to marry is worth your time and well-thought-out vows.
  2. Are you going to be sharing your wedding vows publicly at your ceremony or privately between the two of you? This decision will completely shift your writing process. You’ll either be sharing information about your relationship with the audience of guests OR you’ll be speaking directly to the person you know most intimately. 
  3. Don’t forget to write them out ahead of time. I shot a wedding once where there was no cell service, so the couple could not access their vows. They had to try to recreate them from memory – it was added stress they definitely didn’t need! Plus, you can turn handwritten wedding vows into beautiful art pieces for your home. 
  4. Allow yourself to write multiple drafts. You do not have to sit down and knock out the perfect vows all at once. Get it right. Again, your fiancé is worth that effort.
  5. Find inspiration in movies. Yes, this is your excuse to watch some sappy rom coms. You can even watch wedding videos of other couples to see what they chose to say. Be careful to not lose focus and write based on someone else’s story!
  6. Practice saying them out loud and time them. Two minutes is a sweet spot, especially if you’ll be saying them in front of guests.
  7. Read them to a friend if you’re uncertain, to make sure it goes over as intended.
  8. Talk to your significant other ahead of time in order to determine the length and the vibe you want to go for.  

elopement vow books field notes

Some questions to help you brainstorm for your own wedding vows:

  • When did you know you wanted to spend forever with him/her?
  • How has he/she changed you?
  • What have you been through together?
  • What does he/she mean to you?
  • How has he/she supported you?
  • What does he/she do best?
  • What do you love most about him/her?
  • What moments stick out as the most meaningful and represent you both most?
  • What do you see in your future with him/her?
  • What do you want to promise, and what promises will mean the most to your fiancé?
intimate wedding vow books

Example Wedding Vows:

Chase and Victoria chose to read their wedding vows privately to each other (besides the photographers/videographer) in the most special intimate setting. They were probably the most emotional vows I’ve witnessed yet. 

Chase: I promise to lead you towards Christ and be an example for you to follow every day of our lives. I promise to protect you and always make you feel safe and known and understood. I promise to be patient with you and give you grace when you need it. I promise to be gentle with your heart and understanding when tough times come. I promise to make you laugh when you need to laugh and hold you when you need to cry. I promise to tell you you are beautiful and affirm you every day so you can be confident in yourself the same way I am confident in you. I promise to shower you with gifts and keep the surprises coming so that we will never get stuck in the same boring routine. I promise to show you off in public and never hide how much I love you. I promise to be silly with you and enjoy the gifts God has given us and has in store for us. I promise to keep things clean and tidy the best I can. I promise to put your dreams and goals before mine, because you mean more to me than any other dream I could ever think of. Tor, I promise to love you forever and ever and I can’t wait to start the journey today.

Victoria: Than you. Thank you for loving me better and deeper than I ever thought possible. Today and every day I promise to be here, to be fully present and committed to you. I promise to hold your hand through hills and valleys. I promise to try to make you laugh each day and never go to bed angry. I promise to try to make you laugh each day and never go to bed angry. I promise I won’t run when things get heard. I choose to stay even when life feels overwhelming and our hearts are hurting. I promise not to push you away, to let you into my world, my heart and my mind even when it feels messy. Chase, I promise to pursue Jesus with you, to let the Holy Spirit lead us whoever we go. I promise to always point you to him and to make him the cornerstone of our marriage. I can’t promise our life together will be easy, but I promise to stay by your side through it all. I promise to play games with you and give you a hug each day. I promise to see the possibilities with you, support your dreams, and dream with you. You are the love of my life, my best friend forever. Today I promise to be your girl for the rest of my life. 

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